Thanks for staying

Right now I have a pumpkin pie, stuffing and the base layer of a cream of celery soup all cooling on the kitchen counter.

I didn't intend to cook tomorrow. We were planning on going over to Reed's hometown to spend some quality family time and eat great food cooked by his stepmom.

However, after a LONG drive home on Sunday from Ft Bragg with Sky crying all the way from the Coast through the hills into the town of Leggett, I vowed never to get into a car with him again.

Until he is 40 years old, maybe 50.

Coupled with the onset of Sky's first cold and a strong need for the four of us to spend time together, I think staying home this holiday has worked out for the best.

So tomorrow North will help me make cranberry sauce (he likes to eat the berries) and I will whip up some cream for the pie. Reed will roast the bird and I will reheat the soup and stuffing.

I think we will have a good day anyway.

The moment you discover Life again

I follow a woman's writings of a journey. She and her family started in a house in Austin then gave away most of their things to pursue a life on the road while living in an RV. The family was having many amazing experiences until the discovery of a new pregnancy followed by a huge loss of finances curtailed the wanderings. The family decided to settle into a cabin in the mountains as they transitioned into a family of five (plus a huge, hairy dog).

I follow this blog because I admire this family's can-do spirit. This family has such positive energy as they embrace the spirit of life; not the physical "wants", but the spirit of happiness from within. I admire that they are choosing a path in life that is not typical. This family seeks adventure, but always within the boundaries of each members' comfort zone. Mostly I admire the pure freedom of the family.

Anyhow, they had their baby and the birth went great. You can read a little bit about in in a post called Surrender.

The moments of discovering the new life of a baby, your baby, with the world narrowing to only yourself and that wonderous new being, with life changing, rotating a full 180 degrees and becoming perfect once again, that is what a birth is. As a birth should be.

I am so happy Amy had such an experience.

Swim time

This weekend, the kids and I traveled to Ft. Bragg to see some friends and celebrate their son's 5th birthday. The party was held at the recently completed Aquatic Center.

Although there were many friends in the water with their own kids, I felt that I needed to stay ashore with Sky as he watched the action from his stroller. And as long as he had a strap to chew on, Sky was happy!

The pool was amazing. It had a large, shallow area with fountains and sprinklers for the little kids to play with. A regular 4-5ft shallow section linked into a "lazy river" moving current, complete with inner tubes. In addition to a lap area and a deep diving section, a huge tube slide made the whole set up complete!

North had a great time. My friends helped out by taking North out into the deeper water to swim in. When they weren't with him, I had to keep convincing him not to venture back into the deep water. As I didn't go in the water, I felt a bit stretched when he decided to be adventurous. After 45 minutes, I couldn't take it anymore and made him get out. Luckily it was cake and ice cream time.

We drove home right after the party. It is a three hour drive, but who could complain when the ocean parallels the highway? It is such a beautiful coastline.

Farewell ocean! (for the next two hours until the road winds back to the coast) I love living near the ocean. I don't think I could move away from all the energy.

Time to download the camera pictures

Lately North has been asking for a books while we are driving in the car. Sometimes he reads them, sometimes he does this. On this particular trip, he used the book to block the sun (all his own idea, I add) then fell asleep.

Big guy, Little guy

A butterfly found itself inside our house recently. North explored it for a while then was devastated when we released (ok, it was Mama who was the "bad guy", Reed was fine with North's continuous insect torture!) the butterfly outside.

Sky "airing out." He loves to wiggle around!

One more cute picture of Sky for the road

Numbers, sch-numbers.

As Sky has a doctors appointment coming up, out of curiosity I looked on the CDC and WHO growth chart websites to see how my kids "rank."

North:
WHO- 15th percentile
CDC- 3rd percentile

Sky:
WHO- 97th percentile
CDC- 75th percentile

To better understand the numbers I was seeing, I looked for the methods used to create the numbers in the age-to-weight graph for both organizations. I had always assumed (based upon what I had previously read) that the CDC chart was an older chart using data from formula fed babies from the 50's.

Oops, wrong assumption on my part. The data was actually revised in 2000 to more accurately reflect the current (at the time) population of both formula and breast-fed babies. So formula babies are still included in the chart, messing with the results in my opinion, but at least the numbers are a bit more accurate in regards to my children's feeding habits.

The CDC says:
"Breast-feeding is recommended as the feeding method of choice for most full-term infants during the first 6 months after birth and should be continued with the addition of solid foods through the first 12 months (58). The association between breast-feeding and size and growth in infants has been the topic of many investigations. In general, breast-fed infants tend to gain weight more rapidly in the first 2–3 months. From 6 to 12 months breast-fed infants tend to weigh less than formula-fed infants (18,59). These observations have led to recommendations for the development of new infant growth references based on healthy breast-fed infants (18,19,60,61). A study sponsored by the WHO is currently collecting data at study centers in six countries. These data will be used to develop a new international growth reference."

So I carried on over to the WHO website to see how their data was obtained to create a growth charts.

"The WHO Multicentre Growth Reference Study (MGRS) was undertaken between 1997 and 2003 to generate new growth curves for assessing the growth and development of infants and young children around the world.

The MGRS collected primary growth data and related information from approximately 8500 children from widely different ethnic backgrounds and cultural settings (Brazil, Ghana, India, Norway, Oman and the USA).

The new growth curves are expected to provide a single international standard that represents the best description of physiological growth for all children from birth to five years of age and to establish the breastfed infant as the normative model for growth and development."

-homepage of World Health Organization: growth charts

Yea Breast milk! The real normal growth!

But really, my children are not starving in a third world country nor are they bloated out on synthetic formulas. Numbers, sch-numbers. Both North and Sky are healthy and vibrant even with their vastly different growth patterns. The bottom line is that breast milk keeps a baby healthy.

Doctors (and the medical system) should spend more of their time guiding families towards optimal nutrition of children. Educating families on the physical and emotional importance of nursing, explaining how "nursing-on-cue" benefits both mother and child, increasing milk supply when needed, taking steps to insure a comfortable culture in which a mother can feed her child, all these things and more will lead to a better health of our children and adults.

I am feeling a desire to write, yet am not certain about a topic. I could write about a recent birth, broadcast (and excessively commented on) live on the internet. Or write about the way our family is choosing to protect ourselves this flu season (simplified version: garlic and hand sanitizer). But I don't feel like being opinionated today, the mood I feel is too laid back for drama. I took North and Sky to Cafe Mokka today for hot chocolate. North took one sip of his chocolate and then was done with his drink. The drink was VERY rich, so I understood why it was too much for his taste buds. Afterwards, we walked around the frog pond in the rainy drizzle. It was very nice.

The boys and I have been doing a lot of hanging out around the house lately. North had a friend over yesterday to play. As I watched and interacted at the appropriate moments, I realized that North needs help sharing. What two-year old doesn't? But the way in which North says "Mine!" is rather annoying, so the next time a friend comes over to play, I will have that family bring over a couple of toys of their own so we can work on negotiating skills and using appropriate language together.

I am working on a rewards chart to use with North. He really enjoys stickers and so I will use stickers help him visualize a system of rewards. My thinking is this: Reed and I are using discipline and harsher voice tones more often with North as his expressive language and mental capacities are creating more instances of defiance and impulsive behavior. I use "the red chair" (stern voice over) as a time out/ change the energy discipline object. For us the discipline is not the act of sitting in the chair, but instead the talking over the problem afterward. Some days, depending on my levels of patience (and willingness to predict a behavior before a problem occurs!) North visits that red chair more often then I feel is helpful for the both of us.

Therefore, I want to also reward him for the good behavior within our day. He needs to understand that I value his role within this family; all behaviors included. The rewards for good behavior will not be linked to a punishment(i.e. coercion or bribery), but hopefully will build North's character at the same time as he is developing the emotional maturity to understand the logic of his decisions.

I am think I will start off by writing/drawing a picture of three chores: setting the table, sweeping the floor, and picking up toys. All three North does well, but are not yet a mandatory part of the day. Therefore, North can choose whether or not he wants to earn a sticker on his chart for completing the task. Once 4 stickers are on the chart he gets his reward.

I am stuck on the reward part though. I don't want to use sugar food as I don't feel it is a life lesson I want to reinforce with my kids, yet I don't want to use dollar store junk either. I need something immediate and gratifying. North would be happy with just his stickers, but I like the idea of him learning how to work towards a goal. So I am stuck until a brainstorm revels an answer.

Sky continues to do well. The teeth are still giving him some discomfort, but just being close to the breast and having chewies available seem to be helping. North has begun singing songs, so I will often ask him to sing to his brother as Sky loves anything that North does. I am thinking of getting a Bumpo seat to use in the bathtub. I have put Sky in the tub with North a few times and they both enjoy the experience. Sky loves to float on his back, but after a while my back hurts! I think he will enjoy sitting in the tub with his brother. I am thinking that if I keep the water level low and hover VERY CLOSE, IF NOT ACTUALLY BEING IN THE TUB MYSELF, the idea with the chair might actually work.

and then I woke up this morning...

to find another tooth in Sky's mouth!

Pictures

We all went for a hike along the trail at College Cove earlier last week.

In the last few mornings, I have been putting out flour on a tray for North to explore.

Lesson for Mama: corn flour - not so good for cleaning up, bleached flour - even worse. I need to buy corn meal!

Reed went running and snapped a ligament in his ankle. He is on crutches for a few weeks. Bummer for him, but good news for me. Because I had someone around confined to the chair (reading books to North and Sky), I cleaned out the chicken coop, sorted the boys closet, and deep cleaned the fish tank!

Skyer has been drooly practically from the day he was born, but in the last few days he has really wanted to have something in his mouth to chew on.

And so I finally caught up with the game...and look!

Ok, it didn't really show up in the picture, but it is a tooth! He is handling the pain really well. I have two chewies that he really likes and have a circulating supply of frozen washcloths in the freezer for him to use. Unfortunately, like North, Sky has begun growing teeth before he is able to consistently grasp well. It is often me who holds the chewies up to his mouth. Thus, more time in the Ergo! (it is easier to hold a chewie and continue on with our day)

Today as I was paying bills, North said, "I drawed a diamond!" And by golly, he had.

I opened our curtains yesterday morning to see this on the window frame. Yuck. It was so freaky looking that I couldn't even get up the nerve to get close enough to squish it. I sent Reed limping over to to the dirty work. Does anyone know what kind of spider it was?