Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Beach day!

A few days ago, we spent the afternoon at the beach. The sun was out and the dogs needed to run into the waves!



Reed and North dug a hole.


I tried to build a series of sand castles, but North squished my buildings as quick as I could pack the sand in the bucket!



Did I mention that the hole Reed dug was BIG? North loved being down in the sand. The hole went down to the water line, so North had a great time scooping and splashing in the puddle at the bottom. When he bent down, he completely disappeared from view.
When we decided it was time to go, we had to do something about the sandy child. I stripped him off and walked into the waves for a little saltwater rinse. The wind had picked up so I thought North would be upset, but he only whimpered once (we had a sun-warmed towel to wrap around him once we were out of the water). Reed and I were very impressed! The ocean water temp is still very cool. I think North will have not a problem diving with Reed as he gets older. Me on the other hand, no way! That ocean water is freezing even with a wetsuit!

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Kids and babies

Today Reed, North and I went to a birthday party hosted by a family of one of the men that works with Reed. It is interesting; this process of going to birthday parties of other people of whom are not family members. Reed and I are a bit early on the baby-making timeline of our own circle of friends, so many of the parties we have attended in the past few years have been more adult/backyard oriented. Since we have added North to our life, the kid party thing has slowly become more regular.

I have to point out that these kid birthday parties are a little over-stimulating to me. They are fun to go to and it is great to see all the kids with their wild, crazy happiness as they all play together like long lost friends. But sheesh, after three hours of hot dogs, cake and pinatas, I am ready to go home and crawl under the covers for the night. North is upstairs sleeping off a first-time party treat, sherbert ice cream punch. Thankfully, after the punch he didn't notice the birthday cake. I draw the line at the combination of the two sugars on his little stomach.

In a way, today is also his birthday. He is now officially 21 months old. The amount of time he and his brother (....what if this baby is a girl? I hope she wouldn't mind being called a boy for the last 4 months) will be separated by age. Unless the pregnancy runs really late. But I will do jumping jacks and hike up mountainous hills before trying induction. Hopefully it won't come to all that.

On the baby preparedness front, the pantry and cupboards have been washed out and restocked. (you know, in case we fall into a nation wide famine while I am adjusting to having another little one around!). I have washed the windows, but the banana slugs have been out in full force thus leaving their trails over all my hard work. My car has been vacuumed and polished to a glittery shine (in case the baby takes a look at the car during his first car ride and decides that his mom has let cracker crumbs build to unsafe levels). The only thing I am missing is a carseat delivery (hopefully on Monday) and my mom (hopefully on Friday).

Why do we work ourselves into unrealistic cleaning expectations when nesting prior to the arrival of a new baby? It is not as if many women are crippled for life after a birth. My mom certainly doesn't care about the state of the cupboards, she just wants to be able to find the right pot when cooking a meal. And she loves going to the Co-op, so she will probably be disappointed to find that I have stocked more then enough rice and lentils/beans then a small nation of hungry people would want.

I guess it has to do with a settling of accounts in a way. For me, it is nice to enter the labor/birth process feeling as though I have prepared in a both a mental/physical manner and have created an environment that will support my and my family's needs during the baby's birth and the transition/ discovery phase of welcoming a newborn. With every household task I do, I can let go of any pressing thought that might be distracting (as minor or irrational as it might be) to the mind set that allows me to fall into the endorphins that bring on an amazing, positive labor.

That being said, I lately find myself remembering that being pregnant is still easier (being more predictable, that is) then adjusting and caring for a newborn with the added bonus of changing hormonal levels. Today my hips feel as though they are being pulled in opposite directions. I have given up the idea of getting a good night's sleep as I cannot find a comfortable position, then when I finally do I have to get up to pee! AUgh, frustration! I have definitely reached the final grumpy, homestretch phase.

I also have been wondering how this labor will start. I had such a great experience with North, that I find myself falling into the assumption that all will be the same as before. Logically, this is not true. But I still wonder, will labor start with the waters breaking and strong contractions beginning soon after? Or will contractions begin and gradually increase in intensity with an intact bag through the very end? I liked having my waters break so soon with North's labor because it allowed me to jump into a mental state of acceptance/ pain management that I think helped the changes of my body progress in a smooth and efficient manner. However, I have heard other women say that the contractions with an intact water bag are gentler, more peaceful in a way. I wonder what that would be like.

The bottom line is that once labor starts, I am not in control anymore. I open myself up to what my body needs/wants as it works to expel this life that has been growing inside me. I have spent almost a year listening to this little person as he has stretched, tumbled, and kicked with his growing body. He reacts to his family's voices and touches. He moves with such happiness when I drink a glass of water or have eaten a meal. And I feel so amazed when I feel North give my belly a big hug as he says, "hug brother".

I think we are almost really to meet the little guy. I just have to find a cute sunhat first.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Baby Prep: the knife


When we were discussing newborn procedures with our doctor prior to North's arrival, she mentioned that we could use our own tool to cut his birth cord. Reed loved that idea and found a really nice buck skinning knife. He boiled it and packed it into our birth suitcase for the big day.
After the cutting, Reed wrapped up the knife and put it away for a time when North is older. The same procedure will be done with Baby #2.
This particular knife was made by an old man who comes into the store that Reed works at. He has quite a hobby creating these knives made from old sheds. Reed saw his work and immediately thought of the next birth knife. And thus one more birth tradition continues.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Baby preparation: dress rehersal of the birthing pool

We have had the tub for about a week; it was time to blow it up and make sure we had everything we needed. Reed moved the dining room table out of the way to make a nice spot for the pool.



Our water heater is small so we turned it up to the hottest setting to get the maximum amount of hot water. We found that the highest setting was too hot for the plastic, so we added quite a bit of cold water. Next time we will not set the heater so high and thus need less cold water. The temperature stayed between 100 degrees and 97 degrees for about an hour. By then our heater was hot again and we could add extra water. I think we are in business!


It was so nice to be in the tub. The bottom of the tub is inflated with air so I wasn't sitting in the hard floor. The sides are really sturdy and handle my weight when I lean on them. However, the whole tub rocks a bit when I lean on the sides. The walls are thick, I feel confident about their sturdiness, but it made me pause a little the first time I felt it. I would hate to spill all that water!


After I relaxed in the warm water for awhile (bathtubs just aren't comfortable anymore!), I invited North to join me. He also liked the bouncy floor. In the picture he is holding the floating thermometer. We practiced putting our faces in the water and kicking our feet. I see great potential for a summer swimming pool.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Reprint of "attached dad"

Today the three of us are spending a quiet day at home. As it is sunny (finally) and windy, we might break away and go to the beach somewhere; we will play that that one as we go.

I love this list of great fathering attributes I read on PhD in Parenting. I think Reed has done all of the listed. We are so blessed!

- An attached dad knows that real men use ring slings (or wraps, mei tais, etc…).

- An attached dad parents his children to sleep by lying down with them and telling imaginative stories as they head off to dream land.

- An attached dad trusts that his children will wean when they are ready.

- An attached dad takes years off of his own career to be a stay at home dad when that is what works best for the family.

- An attached dad uses tickle fights and monster attacks to elicit shrieks of joy and physical play.

- An attached dad goes to his son at night and joins him in bed when he calls out and says “Daddy, cuddle me tight”.


- An attached dad puts his chores aside and spends the morning cuddling when his daughter says, “Daddy, I need you”.

- An attached dad understands that he doesn’t need to feed formula to be an involved dad.

- An attached dad washes the cloth diapers, over and over again, without being asked, so often that the attached mom can’t remember when she last washed them.

- An attached dad knows you can be firm and set limits without hitting or shaming your children.

- An attached dad loves sharing the bed for afternoon naps.

- An attached dad marvels at the personalities and abilities of his children and beams with pride.

- An attached dad sometimes needs a break and in turn understands that the attached mom sometimes needs one too. PhD in Parenting, June 2009


Reed hasn't become the stay at home parent yet and he is a little slow on washing the diapers =) , but I think this list sums up one of the reasons why I love reading stories from other attachment-parenting families; we all adjust our behaviors according to the needs of each member of the family. No member is of a lesser value or respected any differently just because of their age, gender, or ability.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Dear North

Things you are able to get away with because you are my child:

- waking up at sunrise asking for food

- wanting to hold the watering hose EVERYTIME we water the flowers

- asking for a pickle with every meal (but you still don't get one!)

- asking for a vitamin every day (but you still don't get a vitamin everyday!)

- nursing for what seems like hours and hours, then just when I think you are asleep and I pull away from you, you wake up and ask for a banana. AUgh!

- taking little bites of play-dough when you think I don't see you

- one of your favorite toys is the stick that is used to lock the sliding door. You lose that stick all the time, thus we spend way too much time looking for it.

- eating the strawberries from our garden when they are still green

- at play group you choose to go down the slide over and over rather then join the singing. After the singing is over and it is time to go home, you feel sad about missing the singing and we leave with you screaming and crying.

- eating all the raspberries from the basket before we make it home from the market

Even though we are having more and more days filled with "no's" and the sound of your feet running away from me; I still love you. You are a very creative, bright toddler. Each day we spend together is filled with joy and exploration. I can see a strong connection in the way your mind is developing both reason and communication skills to the little struggles we have throughout the day. You are testing out both your new skills and the strength of the relationship you have with Dada and I. We are firm with our expectations, yet we are listening to your ideas too.

Friday, June 12, 2009

35 weeks

North has taken some great developmental leaps in the past week or so. He has discovered how to climb and now not a tabletop or high surface is safe from his explorations. He sings/yells stories as he plays around the yard or the house. His independent play has expanded into longer amounts of time and now includes many ideas or objects that do not immediately exist.

This creative play has brought on a sense of outside wanderlust as he will start out in the backyard then into the front yard and then up the driveway to the vacant street. He travels into the fields and will go across the culdesac to check out the water in the drain. Most of the time, as I see him move out of one space I will go with him, but I have lost him a few times. Once I found him behind the chicken coop tangled in berry vines. He was not upset surprisingly, he was working hard (and making it worse!) to get unstuck.

It all sounds really bad, but our space around the house is so open with no deep holes or traffic, I feel that North is safe as he wanders. Obviously he is a bit young to be unsupervised, so I am working on his awareness of play boundaries and my own responsibility to be more diligent!

North has also started biting and running away as we call out to him. In one aspect, I am glad that these behaviors have begun before the baby arrives, so that we may work on curbing his impulses without the baby being an underlying issue. I am trying to focus my patience and remember that he will feel out of sorts after the baby arrives. Our time together now is even more special and meaningful as our last moments with just the two of come to an end.

The baby has been very active in the last few weeks. I feel like a prostate cancer patient as I have to pee all the time, yet often it is only the baby pressing on my bladder that is making me feel uncomfortable. All is well health wise as long as I can keep the cramping under control. Walking on the beaches (or even across the grocery store) can often bring on painful cramping so I am moderating the amount of activities I do within each day with napping and book reading with North used as personal resting time. It seems to be helping along with drinking as much water as possible. At the last doctor's visit, he offered to check for dilation, but honestly, I don't want to know! The baby will come when he is meant to. (Let's hope he waits at least another two weeks for the home birth!)

I am gathering supplies for the birth. The midwifes are really picky about the amount of sheets and towels a family must have on hand. I also need that have at least 8 newborn hats and receiving blankets ready along with various other small things. The birth tub is ordered. Reed and I plan to conduct a dress rehearsal of the entire set up and drainage, so that we know how much time to give. Our water heater is tiny, I am worried I won't have enough warm water to labor in. We are brainstorming different ideas to work with that problem.

I don't feel anxious about the labor anymore. After the last ultrasound showed the placenta high and out of the way, I felt a lifting of stress. I am excited to be able to be given the chance to prepare for a peaceful birth again. I have been thinking of different ways to make a print with the baby's placenta. I would love to frame it and keep it up on the wall. Nice to know it won't be cut in half from a surgery!

No pictures for now. I am dreaming of a time when back fat and stretch marks disappear. After this pregnancy, I will certainly not be whiny about beginning to run again. I am feeling taken over!

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Shelter Cove

A few days ago, Reed and I took North and the dogs to Shelter Cove. Reed went diving with two friends and North and I enjoyed the sunshine at the beaches.



The town of Shelter Cove is right on the cliffs. We spent a lot of time playing in a field with rattlesnake grass. North and I made rattles and played hide and seek.







Black Sands Beach was fun, but the creek that runs next to the beach was more interesting. North and I laid out a blanket between a wash of gravel and the slow moving, 2 inch deep creek water. We were out of the wind and loving all the sunshine. North splashed in the water while I read a book on the blanket. The only bummer was that I spilled our drinking water, so we had to go back to town a little earlier then we both wanted.

Looking down at Black Sands Beach from the parking lot. Someday soon I would like to hike from the mouth of the Mattole River to Black Sands Beach. The trail follows the cliff line on the beach and is breathtakingly beautiful.




Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Slow motion chase

This one is for the family. It is very mellow with not much action, but shows North's perseverance and fondness for the "babies". I think North could chase these baby chicks for hours. He usually catches a few, but we have been working on the idea of "petting the chickens". When he picks up a chick, somehow he manages to flip them over so that their feet point up. Needless to say, the chicks are not fond of being upside down.

The structure North is climbing into was our duck house. I found it on Craigslist two years ago and asked Reed to drag it home. We no longer have ducks (yum,yum) so I flipped the house over so the hens won't hide eggs inside and am hoping to find a use for the structure again someday.

The black and white chick is a rooster. The first time I heard him crow, I laughed because I thought the strange, wimpy noise was coming from our neighbor's chickens. Reed pointed out that it was coming from one of our chickens and I shouldn't laugh too hard! The baby rooster uses the blue plastic tote to jump onto the duck house so he can crow in the same place as the big rooster. The baby rooster gets a little nervous about the jumping down part. He will pace the length and shake his feathers for awhile before finally plummeting to the ground. So far the baby rooster and the big rooster haven't had any problems together. All the chickens hang out together during the morning then the older birds and the geese free range in the afternoon and come home in the evening. The babies will venture out, but generally stay around the chicken run boundaries. We haven't been able to determine if any of the other chicks are roosters, so we might be OK for a little while longer. Our older rooster is a very mellow bird, I am hoping that our birds will divide into two flocks and we can keep both roosters.

Tuesday, June 2, 2009

A need for a discussion

A former president of Planned Parenthood wrote an "call to action" article on the murder of Dr. George Tiller. I think the point I agreed with the most is the need for a profound and realistic nation-wide discussion over the matter of a woman's right to make her own reproductive decisions including the realities of abortion choices.


Link to the article published by Gloria Feldt.

CSA veggie day


Today was our day to pick up veggies from Eddy the farmer. North remembered our visit from last week and asked for strawberries right away!
I don't have a picture of all our vegetables because we got home late and I needed to start dinner right away. North had taken such a late nap that he was happy to play with Reed as I fixed dinner, but I still felt rushed. If I serve dinner later then 6:00, it feels late somehow. I guess that comes from eating dinner every night at 5:30 sharp while growing up. No excuses, everyone at the table on time. Anyway, dinner tonight was late but no meltdowns or asteroids fell on our heads, so all was well.
This weeks vegetable take was: 2 lbs of fava beans, 3 summer squash, a bundle of kale, two lettuce heads, 1/2 lb snap peas, 2 small cauliflowers, 1 bunch of carrots, bok choy or arugula (choose one) and a basket of strawberries.
Eddy's recipe called for sauteing the fava beans in olive oil, then adding white wine and garlic and the chopped kale. I cooked it all down for a few minutes and voila, it was done. Very simple, yet tasty. Reed and I really like the addition of the white wine to the kale and beans. It was not something that we commonly do, but will in the future if we have the wine available.
For a protein source, I chopped up some dill, parsley, and lemon balm. After brushing stone ground mustard over two fish fillets from a rockfish that Reed caught on Sunday, I pressed the herbs onto the top and bottom of the fish. The fish was quickly cooked in the pan with a bit of melted butter. Fresh fish is amazing! Fresh herbs when cooking are even better!